Subconscious: Jory, what are you doing?
Jory: Nothing...
Subconscious: Seriously though Jory, what are you doing?
Jory: Seriously subconscious, nothing, I'm not doing anything
Subconscious: Don't you have an essay to write?
Jory: Maybe...
Subconscious: Don't you have three essays to write?
Jory: Yea but they're not due until Monday, Tues and Wednesday!!!
Subconscious: HAH don't kid yourself Jor, it's already Tuesday night and you haven't hardly started one of them, let along looked at the other two.
Jory: But.. but...
Subconscious: So, I ask again.. what are you doing?
Jory: I'M PROCRASTINATING OK? GAWD LEAVE ME ALONE I JUST WANT TO SIT HERE AND FORGET ABOUT HOW MUCH MY SHOULDERS HURT RIGHT NOW AND MAYBE WATCH SOME HONEY BOO BOO. IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK? AM I THAT BAD OF A PERSON FOR WANTING SOME DOWN TIME AFTER SPENDING ALL DAY COOPED UP IN MY ROOM TRYING TO GET SHIT ACCOMPLISHED. GODDAMNIT SUBCONSCIOUS WHY DO YOU ALWAYS GOTTA BOTHER ME LIKE THIS!
Subconscious: *shrivels away into a corner pleading for forgiveness.
Essays are so much worse than exams for me. I'm a condenser of information, not an expander. My essays are always too short, and profs always say "you have some really good points, but you need to expand on them much more". FFS I wrote everything pertinent to the topic I could think of!
ReplyDeleteWhen I finished all my English, Psych, Philosophy, Theology, and History requirements, I was so happy. I thought I'd never write an essay again.
Boy was I wrong. Essays are everywhere, and they will find you. Right now I'm procrastinating writing my personal statement essay for why they should let me into dental school. It's due tonight. I haven't started.